my 9 yr old son

[hagerteen]

I feel your pain and frustration. My son is 8 and he deals with eating issues. Very limited in what he eats. His pediatritian thought I was nuts and an over reactive parent. I have read every internet article and book on the issue and there isn't much information out there. Last summer I took him to a psychologist who specializes in selective eating. She told me he was a bit young for that kind of therapy but since it was his idea to get help she would council him. He went to sessions once a week for a whole summer and it really didn't help. She started also, to introduce the "it's the parent's fault he's like this" I know my child and I don't claim to have always said the "right" thing to my child but as many of you know the frustration that goes with having a child like this, but I know he's not like this because of me or his father! I have now found a new pediatritian who is wonderful. She has really taken an interest in this and said she has other patients with similar problems. She said a lot of it is sensory issues. (he is also dyslexic, and I'm finding they can be related) Do a search on the internet for Sensory Integration. You will be amazed at how this eating disorder falls into that catagory. Starting in November my son will start seeing a speech/occupational thereapist that specializes in sensory integration issues. You may read a lot about autism when researching sensory issues, and this used to turn me away from researching it further, because my son is not autistic. However, their eating issues can be very similar. Hopefully giving you another avenue to search on-line will help. I'm am learning the hard way how important it is for us to be our children's advocates. This issue is VERY complicated for people who havent lived it to really grasp what's going on. We need to learn to ignore them...even though it's really hard

[kadee]

My daughter had eating issues from the day she was born. She is now 28 and is still working on trying new foods. had her in therapy when she was twelve. I finally took some food with me to a session so the therapist could try to get her to eat something new. I left the room. The therapist came out after about 15 minutes looking frazzled and said, "You didn't tell me she was that bad about trying new food." I of course insisted I did. Let the doctor or therapist try to get the child to eat. Then they will see your dilemna. Worked for me.

[debbie1964]

Oh my god..... this thread could be about my child, I am so pleased I have stumbled on it. My son is 10 and has not eaten properly since 2. i believe he has selective eating disorder as he eats only specific foods/ brands/ and def leaves out whole food groups. I thought no-one else had this problem as friends and family either give me "starve him and he will soon eat" talk or "oh don't worry he'll grow out of it, mine didn't eat chicken etc etc ".... hardly the same i'd be delighted if it was only chicken he didn't eat! Or worse tell me that his Dad and I are just not trying to encourage him.... believe me we have tried....he was once sick LICKING a baked bean

Liked the list of what the 2 year old eats as my boy is very similar...what is it with yorkshire puddings that appeals and like the 9 year old he wants to change but can't actually try anything new

He ate fairly normally till about 20months old when he got gastroenteritis which left him ill for about 5 days and since then has had a very selective list of food which he has day in day out and similar for lunch/ tea every single day. . Over years health visitors and school have not been too worried about him as he is tall for his age and solid, but now its causing problems for him when friends invite him for tea and he refused to go on one school camp that was all about world war II and they would be fed war type food and rations ..well that panicked him no end.
his foods are
cereals ( cheerios, golden nuggets, coco pops or rice krispies or frosties)
milk
yoghurts but with no bits in
bread... white and ideally hovis or french
marge ...preferably flora but will eat unsalted butter if we are abroad
bananas
raisins
skips, quavers or wotsits.... no potato based snacks
yorkshire puddings
penguin or club chocolate biscuits
most family type biscuits (custard cream, bourbons)
homemade pancakes (i do cheat and buy packet mix now)
jam
chocolate spread
peanut butter (smooth and not supermarket own brand)
apple juice and orange juice
fruit squashes and coca cola and lemonade


so NO fish, meat cheese, no veg but plenty of dairy/ carbs

Good luck to all of you and I'm now going to try to find some help for him but not sure where to start.
Debbie

[msharpe]

Your doctor sounds like a moron. No social service person will take this seriously, especially since you are being so open about the problem and you have another child that eats... I'm sorry you had to go through that. Like you need more to worry about!
My son is similiar. I feel like a horrible mom all the time when I pack his lunch. The worst was when we went to Disney- I had to pack his special foods and bring them to the park. All he would eat there was McDonald's french fries.
I worry so much as his health as an adult. I worry that I'm setting him up for diabetes or high cholesterol. My doctor listens, but she tells my son the same thing each time- "I need you to try one new food for your mom." He always "yes's" her. The whole thing is frustrating and heartbreaking for me, especially since I'm a very healthy eater.

[pspilles]

My son is about to turn 10 and he IS the kid you are all describing! We've put up with pediatricians laughing us off for years...not to mention the "he'll eat when he's hungry" (he didn't and his daycare providers beged us to send his special foods for fear he'd pass out) and "he'll out grow it" (it's been nearly 8 years now!) and every other comment in the book. My husband and I go back and forth on worrying about him: he's the smartest kid in his class (started reading at age 4), athletic, healthy and socially a leader but his eating is such a problem. Putting a name to it with SED makes me feel a bit better but I don't know where to go for help. This label seems to be from the UK and not the US: can I find help in the US? We live overseas during the school year and I know I can't find good help where I live but I'm hoping I can find some in the US, specifically in South Dakota. I know this is going to become a social problem bc he chooses not to go to friends' houses, esp. for sleepovers bc of his food issues. His diet is very close to what you've all listed: mostly carbs, no meat, no veggies (unless carrot juice and pureed carrots snuck into foods count) and hardly any fruits, even. It's a texture thing and it's a control thing. He gags and gets anxious when confronted with new foods. I'll continue to research and seek out help but I'm so glad to have found this forum!

[hagerteen]

Try looking into an occupational therapist. I am taking my son to FINALLY see one in a few weeks. It took forever to finally find a Dr to give me a referal. I really hope this works but every thing I read it sound like occupational thereapy it the route to go. I hope so!

[xingridx]

hI, I've just found this website after worrying about My 10yr old son since he was about 3. He too only eats a small variety of food and can physically vomit around such things as crisps,bread etc. He is struggling with what is bordering on obesity due to the fact that he will only eat potato meat and the very occasional piece of fruit under duress.( He has to have a variey of potato so I tend to let him have fries or roast to vary the meals) Like your son he will not eat at school and comes home ravenous. He also tends to overeat on his very limited diet. We are due to see a paediatrician this week after 5 years of g.p visits...I think they just want me to stop going to see them . Other people see this as the child in control but I'm sure there is some kind of problem here. Just interested to find out if your child takes any regular meds for asthma etc. ?

[hagerteen]

I know your frustration. Don't let people let you believe that it's "your child in control" That is not true. Some people, including Dr's can be so ignorant, especially if they don't understand. I am still in search of help for my son. I recently changed pediatricians and she is helping me find help for him. We have an appointment to see an occupational therapist in a couple of weeks. I really don't know where we will go if this ends up being a dead end, but I refuse to give up. My son does not take regular meds other than vitamins. Just out of curiosity, does your child have any type of learning problems? My son is dyslexic and other parents I've had contact with have said their child also has some sort of learning difficutly. I'm really convinced they are connected some how, but I can't get any professionals to listen to me. They just don't know much about this because so many people write it off as just being "picky eaters" My son is also getting "heavy" and I know it's becaue of his poor diet. My heart breaks for him because I know he doesn't like being like this.

[Lesley]

hello
there is a connection between selective eating and low self esteem / lack of confidence.
Maybe the learning difficulties is linked to poor confidence, which is then linked to selective eating
just a thought

[xingridx]

Hi thanks for your support. My son doesn't have learning difficulties but his self esteem is very low. I have always thought this is due to his heavy weight. He won't go out of the house alone or be alone upstasirs in the house. Bedtimes are a nightmare and most nights my husband or I will sit in his room until he sleeps.He will be 11 tomorrow and I really want some help for him so that he doesn't carry this into his adult life.